Dumpty & Makeshift

I’ve just got back from the 2005 film awards, and before I say any more, here are the winners:

· Best bloke who was in that thing – The one who was in that war movie

· Best bloke who was also in that thing – The bloke who did that thing about the bat

· Best music from that thing – The one from the car advert

· Best special effects – the bit where that thing blows up and he falls about 100 feet onto a thing

· Best lass who was in that thing – the one who married that bloke who’s in that band

· Best lass who was also in that thing – the one who had the boob job

· Best bloke who made that thing – the guy who made that thing about the shark

· Best thing– the one where he’s a lawyer or something and she pretends she doesn’t like him but actually she does and so does he